My thoughts returned to Tharmanay Kyaw Sayadaw unexpectedly tonight, however, that is frequently how memory works.
Often, a trivial event serves as the catalyst. This particular time, the sound of sticky pages was the cause as I turned the pages of a long-neglected book resting in proximity to the window. Such is the nature of humid conditions. I found myself hesitating for a long moment, pulling the pages apart one at a time, and his name emerged once more, silent and uninvited.There is a peculiar quality to revered personalities such as his. You don’t actually see them very much. If seen at all, it is typically from a remote perspective, viewed through a lens of stories, memories, and vague citations whose origins have become blurred over time. Regarding Tharmanay Kyaw Sayadaw, my understanding comes primarily from what is missing. The void of drama, the void of rush, and the void of commentary. These very voids speak more eloquently than any speech.
I remember once asking someone about him. Not directly, not in a formal way. Just a casual question, as if I were asking about the weather. My companion nodded, smiled gently, and noted “Ah, Sayadaw… very steady.” That was all—no further commentary was provided. At the time, I felt slightly disappointed. Looking back, I realize the answer was ideal.
Here, it is the middle of the afternoon. The illumination is flat, lacking any golden or theatrical quality—it is simply light. I find myself sitting on the floor today, for no identifiable cause. Perhaps my spine desired a different sort of challenge this morning. I find myself contemplating steadiness and its actual uniqueness. Wisdom is a frequent topic of discussion, yet steadiness seems more difficult to achieve. Wisdom can be admired from afar. Steadiness must be lived in close proximity, throughout each day.
Throughout his years, Tharmanay Kyaw Sayadaw endured vast shifts Political shifts, social shifts, the slow erosion and sudden rebuilding that has come to represent modern Burmese history. Yet, when individuals recall his life, they don't emphasize his perspectives or allegiances They emphasize his remarkable consistency. He served as a stationary reference point amidst a sea of change How one avoids rigidity while remaining so constant is a mystery to me. That particular harmony feels incredibly rare
A small scene continues to replay in my thoughts, although I cannot be sure my memory of it is perfectly true. A bhikkhu meticulously and slowly adjusting his attire, with the air of someone who had no other destination in mind. It might have been another individual, not Tharmanay Kyaw Sayadaw. People are often blurred together in the landscape of memory. However, the emotion associated with it persisted. That feeling of being unhurried by the expectations of the world.
I frequently ponder the price of living such a life. I do not mean in a grand way, but in the small details of each day. Silent sacrifices that do not seem like losses to the casual eye. Forgoing interactions that might have taken place. Permitting errors in perception to remain. Letting others project their own expectations onto your silence. I do not know if such thoughts ever entered his mind. It could be that he didn't, and that may be the very heart of it.
My hands have become dusty from handling the book. I brush it off absentmindedly. Composing this reflection feels somewhat gratuitous, but in a good way. Not everything needs to have a clear use. At times, it is enough just to admit. that certain lives leave an imprint click here without ever trying to explain themselves. Tharmanay Kyaw Sayadaw is such a figure in my eyes. An aura that is sensed rather than understood, and perhaps intended to remain so.